Who Cares For The Caregivers?

September 5, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Where were you?

This is something I wrote after publishing my secret journal, Behind The Mask, and I think it is something everyone should read at least once. This is the plight of caregivers.

“Where were you when I had no one to talk to, when I needed to vent, when I needed a shoulder to cry on?

Where were you when I tried to smile and couldn’t?

Where were you when I was too depressed to function?

I needed you. But, you were off with friends and clubs, too immersed in your activities to think of mine.

Where were you when I needed you, and everyone deserted us?”

This is how caregivers feel. This is what I want to change and why I want everyone to Adopt A Caregiver. Pleant this seed and it will grow by word of mouth.

Love and kisses Helene

Please see my website www.adoptacaregiver.org

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , ,

Behind The Mask by Helene Moore

September 1, 2009 By Leave a Comment

To all those who bought my book a huge thank you. The responses to my book have been awesome. When you stand in someone’s shoes, you get to know their feelings, thoughts and emotions. I never tried to make my story a story, I just wrote it day by day to vent my emotions.The sudden diagnosis of Alzheimer’s Disease was so unexpected, so fast and so devastating.

I always tried to smile for my husband, and the struggle was enormous at times. It strengthened our love affair, and it brought us closer together. We shared our days and cried at night in the darkness of the bedroom, holding each other. We knew it was going to be a tough future, but together we would get through it. My love and kisses and his humor helped get us through the rough days. And there were plenty of them.

But then, the Alzheimer’s diagnosis was changed by the doctor. We were free.

That is how Adopt A Caregiver began.  To help caregivers, to be their friend, when the need one so desperately.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver, and tell them you friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , , ,

The Object Of Life

August 30, 2009 By Leave a Comment

I think the object of life is to live. Live fully, in this moment, and in the next moment.

Plan to make every day a good day, a memorable day.

Be kind and compassionate to yourself and to others. You have to stand in someone’s shoes before you can judge them.

That’s why I published my book, Behind The Mask. Stand in my caregivers shoes for a little bit, and know the emotions and thoughts that go through someone’s mind who is a new caregiver.

I believe in supporting caregivers. All you have to do is look around your neighborhood. Write an email, become a friend. Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , ,

An Article I Wrote

August 20, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Here is an excerpt from an article I wrote and never sent out. I wrote it for Chicken Soup: Not Really Retired.

Retired, I thought I was retired, but no, at age 77 I published a book, Behind The Mask by Helene Moore, and started a Non Profit Foundation. Adopt A Caregiver. I’m no longer retired.

It happened after I wrote in a secret journal when my husband was suddenly diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. I needed to smile for him, and keep my sanity. Seven long hard years later when the doctor changed his diagnosis to Age Associated Memory Impairment, I showed my husband my journal. He said to publish it, it was our love story and it might help someone.

On February 28, 2008 I received my boxes of books. No what, I thought?  As soon as the initial excitement settled down, I realized my book had a purpose and that was to help support caregivers.

And so, Adopt A Caregiver was born. After reading my book, and understanding what it’s like to stand in a caregiver’s shoes, I knew people I talked to and people who read my book would understand my ideas.

It’s the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life.  Helene

P.S. This is only a portion of the article.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , , ,

A-Z Feelings About Alzheimer's Disease

August 18, 2009 By Leave a Comment

When my husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease I sat down and did an a-z buzzword page on my feelings. I want to share them with you so that you can help support caregivers. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you. Give a gift that lasts forever and costs nothing.

A=alone, agonizing, abandoned, affecting

B=burden, bereft, blessed

C=cope, cry, chronic fatigue, courage, compassion, community, cliches

D=depression, death sentence, dreams, dignity, denial

E=effort, exercise, eulogy, essence, excrutiating

F=family, face the fear, frustration, feelings,

G=good days, grateful, guts, God

H=hope, hopeless, helpless, heartwrenching, humor, hold me

I=I got us on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous

J=job, journal, jeopodize

K=kisses, killer, knowledge, knife

L=love, letters to kids, label

M=movies, meds

N=notes every day, it’s not him, it’s the disease

O= obesity; we beat it, bankruptcy: we beat it

P=prisoner of the mind and soul, pity, pain, poignant, power of attorney

Q=quality of life

R=robs you of yourself, raw

S=secret, smile, slow death, spokesperson, soul, strong, spirit

T=time, Thanksgiving, thorough

U= ultimate,

V=victim, void, victory

W= where are you, I know you are in there, wallow in pity

X=x-rated, x ray

Y=yell, yearn, yoke yanked

Z=zombie, zap, zero

We were the lucky ones, they changed the diagnosis from Alzheimer’s Disease to Age Associated Memory Impairment, but those seven years were hell. And that’s why I published my book, Behind The Mask.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , ,

Breakthroughs

August 16, 2009 By Leave a Comment

We are making remarkable progress and breakthroughs on Alzheimer’s Disease and other diseases as well. But, we are not making enough of a breakthrough for the caregiver!

For the person on call 24/7 who is lonely and feels emotional distress is the caregiver. We are paying attention to the patient, but not the caregiver.

Be a friend, email someone you know who is a caregiver. Tell them you want to support them, be their friend, email them, and keep in touch. Do not judge, for you have not stood in their shoes.

That’s why I published Behind The Mask by Helene Moore to show what it’s like to stand in a caregiver’s shoes, and feel her emotions and share her thoughts.

Support the caregiver. Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , ,

Make Happy Memories

August 9, 2009 By 1 Comment

I try to make every day a good day. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. Even if it’s one thing I do that pleases me, it is a good day. I feel so blessed to be around my family again. But, as we, my husband and I get older there are more decisions to make, more time spent doing the little things that need to be done. Things that used to take us no time to do, are now time consuming.

I am thinking of going back to writing my memoirs again. I have started them two or three times already, and somehow never finished it, or put together what I do have. I have looked back on my life and realize I have done things most people never even dream of doing. Yet, I feel that my life has been very ordinary.

Which means, I think everyone has a story to tell. I want to tell mine so that family and friends can stand in my shoes for a little while and understand the choices I have made over the years.

Everyone’s life has ups and downs, and yes, all the cliches are true. I will tell most of my story in short scenes or anectdotes and hope it will answer any questions about me that my readers (family and friends) have.

Even when I was a caregiver for those seven years I wrote about in my book, Behind The Mask, I was making happy memories to store up and keep for myself. The new book about my life, will make happy memories for those reading it. I hope.

Support caregivers in your community. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , , ,

Community

August 8, 2009 By Leave a Comment

What is a community? To me, a community is where you live, work, go to school, play golf, Mah Jongg, belong to a temple or church, anywhere you congregate regularly with the same people is a community.

And in your community there are caregivers. Think about caregivers; unless you can stand in a caregivers shoes you have no idea what they are going through. Their emotions, thoughts, actions might not be why you think.

My book, Behind The Mask was written as a secret journal that no one was supposed to read. When the doctors changed my husbands diagnosis I showed him my journal and he said to publish it, that it might help someone. I hope by standing in my shoes for a few short hours you will  have a better understanding of ‘standing in the caregivers shoes’.

The outcome of the book is that I started www.Adopt A Caregiver.org

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , , ,

A Perfect Day

August 5, 2009 By 2 Comments

What’s a perfect day for you? Mine, well, mine would be to sleep all night, not get up too early, to have sunshine all day, spend time, alot of time with my husband and have a lot of time just for me.

My time, alone, reading, writing, using the computer, or just sit in the chair and think about the story I’m writing.

To do what I want, when I want and not to feel guilty about it.

It would be nice if caregivers could do the same thing. You must stand in their shoes and think about what they are thinking, their emotions and choices. That’s why I published my book, Behind The Mask, so you could stand in my shoes for a little while, while I was a caregiver for seven years.

What came out of that book is Adopt A Caregiver. A simple plan to have you adopt someone in your own community who is a caregiver. Just email them, be their friend, encourage them to write an email back to you, to vent, to journal, Please do not judge them, for you have not stood in their shoes.

I am still thinking of that old woman I saw in Crystal Court last week, all alone. What was she thinking, was anyone going to pick her up and take her home. I am so sorry that I did not stop to speak to her, because she is still stuck in my mind. I pray she is all right and that someone is caring for her.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Where Were You

July 29, 2009 By Leave a Comment

“Where were you when I had no one to talk to, when I needed to vent, when I needed a shoulder to cry on?

Where were you when I tried to smile and couldn’t?

Where were you when I was too depressed to function?

I needed you, but you were of with friends and clubs, too immersed in your activities to think of mine.

Where were you when I needed you, and everyone else deserted us?”

This is what I left out of my book, Behind The Mask because I thought it might be too brutal. But this is how caregivers feel.

This is what I want to change, and why I want everyone to Adopt A Caregiver. Plant my seed and let it grow by word of mouth. Together we can make a difference, one by one by one.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver, and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life.

Look at my new website www.adoptacaregiver.org

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , , , ,
« Older Posts
Newer Posts »