I Miss Writing

April 4, 2009 By Leave a Comment

I miss writing! I miss the thoughts and the ideas that come to me when I’m ready to write. Soon, I hope. Maybe I’ll find a time during the weekend, as I have part of a memoir story I want to write. It’s about the contrast when Howard and I were first engaged, and I met his extended family, and he met my extended family. Huge contrasts.

Over this weekend, I will tackle my closet. The hard part is done. Just have to pack it up. Same with the kitchen, we weeded out a lot of things we haven’t used in years, and what’s left can be packed except for the few pots and pans and dishes we will be using for the next 5 weeks or so.

In the meantime, please support the caregivers in your community. Adopt A Caregiver, and tell them your friend Helene sent you. Just write an email, be their friend.

If you don’t know how a caregiver feels, read my secret journal,  Behind The Mask, and stand in the caregivers shoes for a few hours.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

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Grateful For The Big Things In Life

March 30, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Husband and family still first. Howard and I have had many big important things happen in our life, and I expect we aren’t through seeing more of them coming our way.

Think about it this way: If we hadn’t done this, hadn’t moved, hadn’t been there when the teacher arrived, etc. Try that trick in your memoir writing.

In my case, if Howard hadn’t been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease in 1993, and if I hadn’t started a secret journal that no one knew about, and since we were advised to keep this diagnosis a secret, writing in that journal helped me smile when I was with Howard.

Then seven years later, when they changed the diagnosis to Age Assoiated Memory Impairment, and he was fine I decided to show him my journal. And what did he say when he read it with tears in his eyes, “This is beautiful, this is you, and you have to publish it.”

Behind The Mask was born since I had already had the name ready and I had my granddaughter design the cover I was ready. Wasn’t I? Obviously I wasn’t.  It took me many years, eight to be exact, until my journal became a reality.

If not for the diagnosis, if not for publishing my secret journal, I never would have found my new journey in life Adopt A Caregiver. Life has many twists and turns, but you have to be attuned to them.

I’m devoting the rest of my life to Adopt A Caregiver. I will speak to any group, to any church, to any hospital, to anyone who will listen and I will blog every night about it and what I’m doing at the moment. Every community has caregivers. Find one and give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing.

Adopt A Caregiver, and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

And thank you to The Bloom Report and all those who have contacted us. It’s so good to hear from you.

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What to Learn From Behind The Mask

March 7, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Is there anything to learn from my book, Behind The Mask? Yes, by standing in a new caregivers shoes for a few short hours, you will get the whole gamut of emotions I went through for seven years. According to the comments I get, it has changed some lives; it has shown caregivers that they are not alone in their thoughts and their feelings.

Does it matter? Yes. How can you Adopt A Caregiver, if you have no idea what that means. How can you have empathy, understanding, be non judgemental, how can you be a caregivers friend?

After you have read my book, or a different book on the same subject, only then can you know how a caregivers feels, and what she/he gos through every single day.

In your own community, there is a caregiver. Reach out, support that person. Give the gift that lasts forever, and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

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Behind The Mask: Not Included

March 6, 2009 By Leave a Comment

I wrote something that I didn’t include in my book Behind The Mask. Obviously it was something I was thinking about, maybe even subconsciously. But it was there in my mind and I had to write it out. I didn’t include it in my book, but I will share it with all of you tonight. This is a fiction piece I wrote.

“The Last Dance by Helene Moore

Diana knew this would be an extraordinary night. She took a leisurely bath, filling the tub with scented oils. Vanilla and sweet almond oil mixed with lavender surrounded her with lazy luxury. It had been a long time since she felt so calm.

Lying back in the tub she went over the plans for the coming evening. Satisfied, she stepped out of the tub. Diana knew she was ready. It was time.

She dried and powdered her body with silken scent, then threw a short silk shirt over her naked body. She didn’t tie it; she let it flap around her as she walked across the soft carpet into the bedroom.

There on the bed was her husband, her best friend and lover for 40 wonderful year. Diana climbed into the bed. Tenderly she touched Stuart’s face. His eyes blinked once, she nodded in response. Reaching up she kissed his eyelids, her hands moving down his still body.

She rubbed her breasts along his stomach and reached downward and felt his erection. She looked deep into his eyes and he blinked at her, this time very slowly.

One last dance. Bittersweet. Loving and sensual. One last dance, she’d make it beautiful for both of them. After, when her heartbeat returned to normal, she looked again into Stu’s eyes. He blinked. It was time.

Diana lifted the silken pillow, gently placing it over her beloved’s face. Please God let it be quick.

She lay across his heart, holding the pillow tight. His agony was over. She let her tears drop onto his chest.

The last dance was finished.”

Because this was a fiction piece I wrote, I did not include it in the book. The book was entirely true journal entries.

Remember the caregiver, support the caregiver. Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing.

Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

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Community Helps Community

February 20, 2009 By Leave a Comment

When times are bad as they surely are now, it’s even more important for us to band together and help one another.

That’s what communities are for. To help one another in times of need.

Well, let me tell you something, caregivers are always in need. In need of a friend, someone to pay attention to them, to let them vent, to talk about their day, or what they wish their day could be like.

That’s why Adopt A Caregiver works. Because people do care about people.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver.

If you don’t know what it’s like to stand in a caregivers shoes, read my book, Behind The Mask. That is my secret journal I wrote during the time of my husband’s diagnosis of Alzheimer’s Disease in 1993 until 2000, when they changed his diagnosis. The journal saved my life and my sanity.

Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

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Why Should You Adopt A Caregiver

February 14, 2009 By 1 Comment

Why should you Adopt A Caregiver? To help and support a fellow human being who is struggling to maintain herself and the person she is caring for. It’s a wonderrful way to give something back, and so helpful to the caregiver who might be struggling and without someone to talk to.

All you have to do is send an email and offer to be his/her friend. Tell her/him that although you have never stood in a caregivers shoes, you are trying to put yourself there and then let the caregiver take it from there She might be able to open up to you as a friend, as she could never open up to her children or other family members.

When I wrote Behind The Mask, my secret journal, I never thought it would be published. But after it was, I decided it could help others understand the emotions and turmoil the caregiver faces every day. Mine was a secret journal, as we were advised to keep my husbands diagnosis a secret, so I poured myself into the journal, not wanting to be a burden to my children.

I know my book has helped others, they tell me that all the time. They say, “I never knew, why didn’t you tell me?” Well, I’m telling you so you can go out and Adopt A Caregiver in your community and say, my friend Helene sent me.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Happy Valentines Day to all.

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Early Valentines Day

February 12, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Today was an early Valentines Day for the members of the Henderson Senior Center who came to our home  to see our collection of kissing couples. They had a wonderful time, and we had a wonderful time talking about different pieces of art and the stories around them. All faces were smiling as they to get on the bus to go to lunch. An outing that will stay with them at least for a few days. Howard and I loved it. A reporter and photographer were here also from the Henderson Home News and I think they enjoyed themselves also. I hope so. Will keep you posted if the article appears online.

I talked about my book Behind The Mask, and Adopt A Caregiver and a few of the women already were part of my program. They spoke highly about it. The fact they are doing their part, writing emails to someone who is a caregiver gives me great pleasure. In  a few days I will be telling you some of the comments I have received from both the caregiver and the one who adopted them.

As you all know, I have not been well, and I am far behind in my paperwork. But writing on this blog every night is a must for me. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy writing it.

Our Memoir Workshop is coming along nicely. I hope we will be able to do a great job and maybe take our workshop to some senior homes, or even do this workshop in one of our libraries.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

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Beshert (Means Meant To Be)

February 7, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Once in a lifetime something so immense comes up in your life, you just know it’s meant to be. Beshert. That is what happened to me last year.

In 1993 my husband was suddenly diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. Not only was it a shock, but we were strongly advised to keep this a secret. Howard was still working, and they feared his working days would disappear.

I started a secret journal and poured myself into it day by day, so that I could smile for him. No one ever saw this journal.

Seven years later, the doctor changed his diagnosis and I felt we were freed from our prison sentence, one a prisoner of his mind, the other a prisoner of his soul.

When I was sure nothing else was happening, I showed Howard my journal. and he said, “Publish this, it’s our love story, and it might help someone else.”

It took me until last year to publish my book, Behind The Mask, and when I held it in my hands, I knew it had a purpose.

Adopt A Caregiver was born on that day. It truly is the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. We all know a caregiver in our community. All you have to do is send them an email and ask to be their friend.Tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

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One Person Can Make A Difference

February 6, 2009 By Leave a Comment

One person can make a difference, with a little bit of help.

Adopt A Caregiver: there is nothing to join, nothing to pay.

Caregivers are remaining silent behind their mask.

Together we can make this journey a reality.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing.

Adopt a caregiver, there is one in your community. Find him/her and send an email. Offer to be a friend.

If you want to stand in a new caregivers shoes for a few short hours, read my secret journal, Behind The Mask, published last year.

Adopt A Caregiver, and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

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Suppose

February 2, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Suppose you go to a meeting, dinner, church, synagogue, Mah Jongg game, book club, anything where the same people congregate together for the afternoon or the evening.

Suppose you hear that Mrs. Jones is now a new caregiver, her husband had a heart attack, stroke, was diagnosed with Cancer, or Alzheimer’s Disease.

Suppose another person in the group also knows Mrs. Jones, and says she is a nice lady, or she likes to read, or her family is on the other coast.

You could Adopt A Caregiver, give the gift that last forever and costs nothing. Do you have any idea how much this email would mean to Mrs. Jones?

If you can’t stand in her shoes, read my book, Behind The Mask and know the thoughts and emotions that go through a new caregivers mind.

Tell Mrs. Jones that you live in her community and that you would like to be her friend. Encourage this friendship, encourage her to vent to write in a journal , to talk to you. Tell Mrs. Jones you will not judge her, since you can’t stand in her shoes. Just be yourself.

Suppose this were to happen to you? Wouldn’t you like someone to adopt you?

Just suppose, then give something back.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

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