An Old Post That Is Still Meaningful

 

Today is August 20, and this appeared on my blog several years ago.

The most important things in my life are my family and friends; my passion for writing, reading and knitting; and my self respect.

My book, Behind the Mask, shows the complete range of emotions a new caregiver goes through each day.

Alzheimer’s disease is not contagious, yet the caregivers are usually left alone without the support of friends and neighbors, even family. This disease can last for many years, leaving the caregiver worn out and alone.

Adopt A Caregiver is my unique way of giving back. All you have to do is check your neighborhood, your social clubs, church, synagogue, your doctor’s office, the Alzheimer’s Caregiver’s message boards, and the Mayo Clinic message boards.

Just send an email or phone the person who needs a friend, listen and come back often to let him/her know you care and are thinking of them. Just being there to listen is a huge help.

Adopt a Caregiver. Give something back: Contribute to the well being of people who are so busy caring for others.

The above was on my blog a few years ago.

Now I’m faced with my husband’s new diagnosis, early stage of Alzheimer’s Disease,

We are taking it one day at a time, making memories each day and being grateful of the time we have together and with our family. They are our greatest supporters.

Keep love and kisses in your life.

Community

What is a community? To me, a community is where you live, work, go to school, play golf, Mah Jongg, belong to a temple or church, anywhere you congregate regularly with the same people is a community.

And in your community there are caregivers. Think about caregivers; unless you can stand in a caregivers shoes you have no idea what they are going through. Their emotions, thoughts, actions might not be why you think.

My book, Behind The Mask was written as a secret journal that no one was supposed to read. When the doctors changed my husbands diagnosis I showed him my journal and he said to publish it, that it might help someone. I hope by standing in my shoes for a few short hours you will  have a better understanding of ‘standing in the caregivers shoes’.

The outcome of the book is that I started www.Adopt A Caregiver.org

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Cataract Surgery

Yes, my husband needs cataract surgery. The doctor wants it done soon. So, August 8th is the date.

I just need new glasses, as my eyes have really changed. I’m grateful that I can read, write, see, drive, and do anything with my eyes that I want. I feel so bad for people with low vision. Missing the spectacular colors of nature, the people you love whose faces are blurred, I have empathy.

You need to stand in someone’s shoes and feel their emotions and then have empathy for them. Listen to what they are saying, really listen, without interrupting.

Especially to caregivers. Their work is never over. Some of them can’t get out to a support group. All it takes is an email to a new caregiver in you community. Be a friend, listen, don’t judge, have empathy, it’s a wonderful way to give something back. The caregivers need anything we can help them with.

Don’t know what it’s like to stand in the caregivers shoes? Read Behind The Mask by Helene Moore. It’s my secret journal that I finally published after they changed my husbands diagnois from Alzheimer’s Disease to Age Associated Memory Impairment. I never expected to let others see my writing, I put my guts into it, but if it helps someone it was the right thing to do.

My book, Behind The Mask, has helped people. Believe me, I have written thank you’s about how it helped others. That means so much to me.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver, and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Listening Is Not Enough

I received a comment asking, “Is listening enough?”

No, it  is not enough. But it is a beginning. It’s a start for the caregiver to know that someone is listening, caring, and that he/she is not quite so alone. Once the listening is established and a friendship base is established, it’s easier to try to make life easier for the caregiver.Believe me, it’s as rewarding for the caregiver as for the person who adopts the caregiver. I hear that from people everywhere.

My Adopt A Caregiver idea is for supporting caregivers. Organizations do it one way, and there are many out there for caregivers to ask for help.

But, sometimes a friend helps. It lets the caregiver know that someone is out there who is listening, not judging, that they are not alone.

Listening is not enough, but it is a beginning. I hope that enough of you out there will at least think about the caregivers who are going through this traumatic experience all alone.

Look into your community, find a caregiver. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene Moore sent you.

Beginnings work themselves into middles and endings. Lets hope for a good ending.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Early Detection For Alzheimer's Disease

I believe wholeheartedly in early detection for Alzheimer’s Disease. Knowing what you are facing, having time to come to grips with it is so helpful in the long run. Exercise, diet, drugs, good doctors and support groups, family members are invaluable. I know, I’ve been there. Now I can sit back and reflect on these issues without the emotional baggage that comes with waiting, and waiting and waiting.

Being aware, being prepared is so helpful, especially in the beginning stages.

How do I know. I was there. My husband received this diagnosis, we had to keep it a secret because he was still working, still a highly functioning individual. I kept a secret journal, which I published later as Behind The Mask by Helene Moore, so someone could actually stand in the caregivers shoes for a little while and understand the anger, emotional highs and lows, the internal thoughts that go through a caregivers mind. And also some of what goes through the patients mind. ( Howard’s diagnosis was changed seven long years later)

Because of Behind The Mask, I have become a supporter of caregivers, giving speeches, talking about it to anyone I meet, my email buddies and here on my blog.

Look around your community, where you live, work, play, go to school, or social clubs, golf, etc. there are caregivers in your neighborhood. Connect with them, send them an email, become their friend. Do not judge, just be there, stand in their shoes for a moment and help them get on with their life It only takes a few moments to send an email. Please give something back.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing.

Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene Moore sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Family Brunch

Most of the family came for brunch today and we went through 70 years of pictures. Threw out a lot, and the kids and grandkids took the ones they wanted. Yes, I was asked, “Who is this person.” I like that.

Some of the old pictures I will save and write about them either in my memoirs or my journal, including the picture right there for someone to see and read about.

I”ve been tired and hurting these past several days, but this week, we really have nothing planned so it’s time to do some R&R. And maybe some writing.

Talk to you tomorrow. Remember the caregivers in your own community. Send them an email, offer to be their friend. Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Walls, Walls, Walls

That’s what I told Robin Leach when I wrote to Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. Something like everyone knows that real estate is location, location, location, but for the Moore’s it’s walls, walls, walls. And then I went on to tell him about our kissing collection of art.

Well, now that we are selling the art at auction on May 2, 2009 I’m faced with an irony. For 50 years I’ve lived with white walls, so that the art could pop off the walls.

Now, we are moving to an apartment, and I will continue to have white walls. Life has funny turns. Especially since I love color.

The move is moving along nicely. We are well on our way. Howard has packed up most of his clothes and his office. Me, I’ve been working on the art collection — seems like forever. But now I will be able to concentrate on starting to pack my own things.

I would like to be in California for Mother’s Day. That would be my best present.

In the meantime, I have not forgotten my caregiver friends. I mean to keep in touch with them even after I move away. They will always be in my heart. I have made so many wonderful friends; true friends here, and I will miss all of them. You all know who you are!

Take a moment, and think about someone in your community who is a caregiver. Send them an email. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Moving And Memories

As I clean out drawers, files, pictures, the art files, I am flooded with memories. I made myself a promise this morning, after the move, and we get ourselves situated and into our new routine, I have to start writing again.

My projects are many and varied, and I am not getting any younger. I have my Reflections of Me, which is either an autobiography, or a memoir, my short stories, my book called Love and Kisses about the art collection, and something I call First Lines. I have over five hundred of them. I’d like to put them into an      E Book. Of course, I have to learn how to do that first.

Adopt A Caregiver, will still be first on my list. I have a whole new city and state to choose from. I will be glad to speak to communities, groups, national organizations, churches, synagogues, caregiver groups, anyone who will listen. Every community has caregivers, and we must help support them in their time of need. I promise to do that every chance I get.

Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

Everyone Has A Story

Everyone has a story, everyone has their own burdens. We are not alone, we just think we are. I urge seniors to start writing bits and pieces of their lives to leave for children and grandchildren. Imagine their faces, when they read things you did at their age. They only see you as you are now, not as you were then.

Our aging population is growing. Caregivers are being abused. There are stories every day in the newspapers about telephone scams, break-ins, and other types of scams.

Caregivers have enough on their plates, they don’t need this. What they need is a friend.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you. It all starts in the community. Your community!

You don’t know how a caregiver feels, read Behind The Mask, my secret journal that follows me for seven years of my husbands dianosis. We were the lucky ones, they changed his diagnosis, everyone else isn’t that lucky.

I am grateful! We are blessed.

Lets help wipe away some of the caregivers tears. One by one we can do this. All it takes is an email.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene

I Wish

I wish I was more organized. No matter how many times I admit to myself that I have too many  papers, there I go again, saving more. I’m always putting papers aside to read later, and all of a sudden I have a whole batch. Since they are on different subjects, where should I file them? Probably in the circular wastebasket.

I also spent some time writing on my story today. After that I felt brain dead. And believe me, I didn’t do that much writing.

Tomorrow is my relaxing day. I go to the knitting club here at Anthem, with a great bunch of women doing so many different projects. I love it.

Aside from all that, I am grateful today that I spent a lot of time with my husband Howard. We went out to lunch and that was a treat. I am grateful for his support for Adopt A Caregiver, and for his love notes every morning.  I am grateful that the weather warmed up today. Even our Koi fish were swimming a little bit. Slowly, but swimming.

I am hurting, but I am grateful that I can type on the computer, and that I can read my book, and do a knitting project. I am grateful to my loyal readers who come back day after day to read my blog.

I am grateful just to be me.

I am grateful that I adopted my caregivers and that I write to them on a regular basis and I hope you all will spread my words so that my vision becomes a reality.

Give the gift that lasts forever and costs nothing. Adopt A Caregiver and tell them your friend Helene sent you.

Keep love and kisses in your life. Helene